Mixed bag of whiskies of the world de la muerte


May 9, 2019

Mixed bags

Tough love:
Mixed bag of whiskies of the world de la muerte

I mean, whiskies from here and there, without any logic but always with good faith and an open heart. Peace!

Kura (40%, OB, Japan, pure malt, +/-2018)

That’s the thing, you cannot believe what the Japanese are telling us anymore. I’ve seen some reassuring PR campaigns by Nikka and perhaps Suntory, but that’s a little late, in my book and unless a bottle is properly marked with ‘Yamazaki’, or ‘Yoichi’, or whichever proper distillery name, Japanese whisky = totally or partially sourced. I’m sorry. Colour: straw. Nose: bread and banana, sawdust, porridge, baguette. Extremely young, not bad, but totally uninteresting. Mouth: sour and woody, young, extremely bad, immature. Weissen beer aged at Ikea’s. Finish: medium, bad, on sawdust. Comments: nightmare in a bottle. Very bad, €105 a bottle, shame on you! You may stick your bottles up your ears, samurais! (Now this was probably made-up by some fresh-graduated brexity European so-called brand-builders, so no offence meant to our beloved and very engaging genuine Japanese whisky friends). But really, yuck de yuck de yuck de yuck, it is almost as bad as the new Macbooks.
SGP:210 - 29 points..

The good thing is that we control anything that goes here on WF… Like, this answer…

Chichibu 6 yo 2011/2018 (60.9%, Asta Morris, bourbon barrel, cask #1552)

Chichibu 6 yo 2011/2018 (60.9%, Asta Morris, bourbon barrel, cask #1552)
Totally love Chichibu when they do not use unnecessary and unlikely wine woods. Which seems to be the case here… I mean, no crappy wine casks in sight, hurray! Colour: straw. Nose: variations on natural vanilla and small berries, that’s how some folks would describe it. Some porridge, muesli, fresh breads, strawberry yoghurt (always that funny molecule), pink bananas, white currants, and cinnamon and nutmeg from the oak. With water: freshly sawn oak, fresh croissant, green bananas. Mouth (neat): you do feel the youth, and sure it’s a tad excessive as far as Haribo-y flavours are concerned (shall we call them lab fruits?) but on the other hand, it’s got this precursory yeasty side that just ticks and works. Like, pink bananas, Williams pears, cranberries, pomegranates, strawberries… With water: same, just easier, sweeter, and even more on bananas, both pink and regular - and let’s not forget our smaller plantains. Finish: long, very bready, pretty young. Comments: young fresh malt whisky of high quality kept in proper oak barrels. Now, please friends, do something about all those fake Japanese whiskies! They suck and they will bring you all down!
SGP:551 - 85 points.

Phew, had to get that off my chest… But let’s change country before our blood boils…

Puni Nova (43%, OB, Italy, bourbon cask, +/-2017)

Some Italian whisky, first time I’m trying it. As always with our Italian friends, it’s rather a lot about design, although as far as I can tell, this is no Lambo Miura. And at €80 a bottle, the price is not exactly right, is it? Unless, let’s see… Colour: straw. Nose: hello? It’s almost empty, I’m not getting much. Hints of vanilla and wisps of barley. Perhaps. Confectionary, vanillin… Mouth: not too bad, but why? Vanilla, barley, oak, touches of liquorice. Tannins. Thin body. Finish: short, oaky. Some sugar. Comments: this baby has raised some degree of confusion at WF Towers. Why would anyone make some ‘new’ whisky that would be this light? Why not look for proper asperities and idiosyncrasies? Now we'll try a 'better' Puni right tomorrow, so stay tuned.
SGP:310 - 65 points.

Wait, we may have been harsh on Japan, let’s try to make amend… Oh, no!...

Kirin ‘Fuji-Sanroku’ (50%, OB, Japan, +/-2018)

Kirin ‘Fuji-Sanroku’ (50%, OB, Japan, +/-2018)
Careful now. Colour: straw. Nose: bah, vanilla, plywood, cardboard. Ugly, bland, empty. Another Japanese swindle? A pack of Marks & Spencer gums – yes it’s that bland. Mouth: it’s really bad, sour, sugary, planky… In truth we’re about to throw up. What a nightmare! That some well-respected whisky websites would sell this utter swill for approx. €60 a bottle just baffles me. I know money has no smell, but still, guys, if I may, get ahold of yourself! Finish: disgusting. Sugar in the aftertaste – coz sadly, there is an aftertaste. Comments: sourly woody, hardly drinkable, some emetic whisky, really. Even Ozzy wouldn’t have drunk this. Total crookery, you could use it to torture someone, really. Japanese friends, please do something (but yeah, indeed, we’ve got our share of junk whisky in France too, apologies to the world!) I could down a magnum of Johnnie Red to recover, really. Kirin, what the fudge???!!! To think that some Gotembas are/were so good...
SGP:321- 20 points.

Oh yeah, Johnnie Walker, why not…

Johnnie Walker ‘White Walker’ (41.7%, OB, blend, 2018)

Johnnie Walker ‘White Walker’ (41.7%, OB, blend, 2018)
I think it’s about Game of Thrones. I don’t care about Game of Thrones and or franchises, I think I’ve seen two episodes and never quite understood anything, only that the whole shebang seems to trigger lowest instincts. In other words, sex and violence. Why a very well-respected leading whisky company would fall this low, I do not know, but there, there is some juice in the bottle, so let’s see… By the way, that bottle’s very ugly, isn’t it. Colour: gold. Nose: the whisky’s better than the story at this point, for sure. Nice parsley, thyme, meats, old papers, pine needles, bouillons, Bovril, marrow… This is all quite unusual, and it got off the beaten tracks, for sure. Like that, but truth lies on the palate... Mouth: not totally bad indeed, just very weak. Yeah well, those conceited extra 1.7% couldn’t add much powah, could they. Salty soups and puréed chestnuts. Sadly, it tends to become very dry and extremely cardboardy after just thirty seconds, calling for ice. Bad sign, that. Finish: medium, sour and bitter. Bittersweet sauces. Comments: the whole thing doesn’t quite smell right to me. A botched job if you ask me, not very authentic, not very Diageo (Diageo, I’m sorry!)
SGP:231 - 60 points.

What a horrible session today! But let’s show both patience and perseverance…

Milk & Honey ‘Triple Cask’ (46%, OB, Israel, 2449 bottles, 2018)

Milk & Honey ‘Triple Cask’ (46%, OB, Israel, 2449 bottles, 2018)
Matured in red wine, bourbon and Islay wood, what could go wrong? Ha. By the way when was this distilled? Now as for the biblical references, after all, other places, other ways. Colour: gold. Nose: soft vanilla-ed wood, oak, touches of iron, cassis, mashed potatoes and celeriac, gewurztraminer, oak. New furniture, tapioca, nutmeg. Mouth: quite good for a few seconds but very much oak-influenced, and rather unbalanced. Sawdust, wood smoke, then better flavours such as lemons and angelica. Green pepper too, perhaps too much green pepper? Finish: rather long, rather too grassy and spicy. Berries and green pepper. Comments: it’s rather all about the casks, so it’s hard to say whether this distillate has got some potential or not. We shall see, that should be the case. Plus, indeed it defeated the White Walker fair and square.
SGP:452 - 69 points.

What a difficult session! Frankly, it’s been a little tiring. Just between us - and let us speak frankly and drop any political correctness for a moment - the vast majority of the new ‘world’ whiskies are just a waste of barley and other cereals. We do understand the motives, the patriotism, the proudness and the enthusiasm, but seriously, in most cases there’s just nothing to write home about. But there are exceptions, of course…

Kornog ‘Roc’h Hir’ (46%, OB, France, bourbon, 2018)

As you may very well know, this is Glann ar Mor’s Port Charlotte. Or Longrow. Or Ledaig. So to speak… Colour: straw. Nose: very Kornog, that is to say fruity and smoky, with a lightness and yet some depth. Hessian, olives, pineapples, pears, then tinned sardines and anchovies. Or rather anchoiade, which is a blend of crushed olives and anchovies, with some garlic. No garlic in this whisky though, I was just telling you. Notes of seawater with bitter almonds, which is obviously nice. Mouth: super very très bon! I totally enjoy these olive-y notes, the spicy herbs, the rougher apples (cider apples), and the almondy smokiness. There is a softness, and yet a rather bold, somewhat tarry peatiness. In truth some would find echoes of old Ardbeg in that respect. Which cannot be bad, we agree. Finish: long, very fresh, all on green olives, lemons, smoke, and seawater. Didn’t know they were having olives in the lovely north of Brittany! Comments: it’s the bright smoky freshness that’s most pleasant here. Plus, you can’t go wrong with green olives. And perhaps samphires?
SGP:456 - 88 points.

Good, we’ve found a winner, better call this a session before we stumble upon some one-year-old Outer-Mongolian buckwheat whisky… But there will be more tomorrow.